Being What I’m Born to Be

By Jerry Rothenberg

On a fundamental level, being around John has helped me see that I am much more than what my thoughts and feelings tell me.  The limits I put on myself about what I can be in the world or with others have changed and expanded.  Stepping out of my old identity opens up a spaciousness inside that is like being a free self.  I’m now able to be in the world in a way that is new, spontaneous and caring.

This shows up in every aspect of my living.  In my work, for example, I’m not limited by a pattern of how I am supposed to be as a therapist.  This allows me to relate to my clients from a different base inside myself.  There is an openness and fearlessness and deep compassion that is present in how I move in communication with clients.  So in the sessions there is a tremendous richness that endlessly surprises me.

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It’s All in the Little

By Andrea Geitz

When I met John 14 years ago, I was at an impasse in my life.  Since my early 20’s I’d been engaged in spiritual, self-improvement endeavours exploring  many different paths and disciplines.  By the end of the 90’s I yearned for greater depth and meaning.  And though I always had the opinion that it was not necessary to have a teacher in order to know Truth, my heart wanted an intimate relationship with a teacher who could show me the way.  I met John de Ruiter in 1998.

Our first meeting wasn’t remarkable,  no revelations of Truth and enlightenment.  Rather, there was a quiet knowing, a small and subtle response to his call to ‘home’.  For many years I thought my lack of spiritual firework experiences meant I wasn’t getting it.  Now I know the truth of John’s  encouraging words, “It’s all in the little….Openness and softness of heart is of more value than awakening and enlightenment.”

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Letting Boundaries Go

By Anonymous

As a project manager I have to be adept in many areas; communications, financial management, relating to people, conflict management, planning and it goes on and on. Being with John provides a foundation that supports all those levels. It has given greater abilities in all those aspects. I’m aware of something deeper, and that being present through the day. I am discovering that I am able to focus in the middle of a busy daily schedule that is chaotic, ad-hoc and unregulated. That I can communicate freely with the large number of people I work with. And even when an interaction is not positive, I have a greater understanding of what is driving the dynamic.

Before I met John I was influenced by my history of shyness and being self-conscious. And that was a hindrance in my relationships with people. Through my contact with John I am able to get out of my own way, to develop in a more wholesome way. That has enabled me to easily relate to people in my work. It’s the joy of fulfillment, a development that was hindered previously by my self-consciousness, can now proceed more naturally.

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A Whole Whirlwind of Change with John de Ruiter

By Michael Wallace

John de Ruiter is an amazing teacher; applying his teaching has affected every aspect of my life. It affects my relationships, my way of being in the world, and my approach to the studies I’m currently doing. Because of an inner re-orientation towards life, I’m relying on my inner knowing. I’m drawing from within in relating with everyone and everything. I’m coming from a different place than the accustomed self I’ve been living from most of my life. I have moved into—and becoming stable in—a place of not-self. John speaks of, “Being planted in knowing.” Coming from inner knowing describes my experience exactly. For example, when I am listening to someone speak to me, I am not immediately reacting to what they say or thinking what to reply. I am letting what I hear enter me and move me before I respond to it. Then I am naturally responding from something new, rather than something old, from a fresh response, an un-planned, un-thought-through response.

How My Relationship Has Changed

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Real Relationship

By Jolaine on a John de Ruiter meeting in Canada, January 2012–

Recently I had the opportunity to be at a meeting with John de Ruiter.  There was the most amazing talk about relationship that had to be shared.  The talk came from the question of a woman physician and Mother of two.  I was touched by her sincerity and concern for her relationship with her husband, Bruno.

With sweetness and some hesitation, Tali asks her question.  “Sometimes I find myself in a position of nagging Bruno about coming here to talk to you.  My sense is that sometimes he’s not quite in line with the process.  I don’t want to be judgmental of him, but I do find we’re losing direction.  I know he doesn’t like to be told, but I sometimes think we’re losing direction and it’s really important.”

After connecting from a deep stillness, John responds, “It is something that you know he is to do?  If you’re clear about that, don’t use your person or your self to administer your clarity.  Give what you are knowing to him.  What you are knowing the truth of.  Give it with a heart of inexperience.  If you include your experienced self, your experienced person, then you’ll be making rightness personal.  You’ll be judgmental and nagging.  You’ll be telling him what to do for personal reasons even though based on what you know the truth of.

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Living Real Value

By Caroline Hendley

For me it is about living real value.  In whatever I do, experience or participate in, within I see what is of real value and put my attention there.  For example, there is much going on at work and  some days there is lots of stress.  I see old, familiar ways to respond to the stress, and I also see I don’t have to react in that way. I see the real value and opportunity is to be something more and to express from there.

That more is stillness.  It’s that little gem or light underneath everything that is always there regardless of what is going on above it.  I can more and more recognize that stillness, even though  my mind or emotions may prompt me to go somewhere else.

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A True Teacher

“John’s profound depth and breadth of awareness is rare and extraordinary. He speaks and connects at the highest, deepest and finest levels on any issue.”

By Jolaine

Recently I visited 5 spiritual teachers in San Francisco. It was delightful to attend their satsangs and interact with others in the audience. I had sat with most of these teachers 12 years before, so it was especially rich to see them again. Each one offered real value in their meetings and I’m grateful for the contribution they make to people’s spiritual development.

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The Teachings of John de Ruiter made Practical

By Jolaine

Being successful in business and able to retire at 40, I realized I could keep giving my life to achieving and acquiring more on the surface, but that deeper meaning may never be found. There must be more, and if it wasn’t available on the surface, it must be available within me. So the search began. I learned meditation and received my Master’s degree at a meditation university in the Midwest. Then on to becoming part of a spiritual teacher’s community in San Francisco. Realizing she wasn’

t my teacher, I began searching by sitting in satsang with everyone who came through the Bay area. I enjoyed it all but didn’t find a deep connection with any teacher. And then, I met John de Ruiter.

Within a year, my husband and I moved to Canada to become part of John’s weekly meetings. I knew he was the living example of the “more” within me, of what was most deeply real. I naively believed all I needed to do was be in his presence as often as possible, and, in time, grace would deliver my awakening.

I noticed that some people were quickly deepening into the “more” with John. It was amazing to watch them open and soften and their experiences of the deep increase. I saw much change and transformation, far more than any spiritual group I’d been part of. And as for me, there was some softening, more openness, occasional experiences of something deeper within, but no quick transformation.

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The Goldenness

By Jolaine

Every Sunday I have a conference call with my two Sisters about how to live from the heart and from what is deepest within. In today’s call our discussion was about a recent John de Ruiter talk on living the deepest that you know. John de Ruiter points people to live what they know, to live what is more profound within than our everyday surface lives. And he encourages to come from the deepest that we have awakened to.

So we began Sunday’s call with each of us sharing the deepest we know that we have awakened to. The call was amazing. All three of us discovered much about knowing and how to live that.

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Doing the Laundry Within

By Jolaine

Recently I attended a meeting with John de Ruiter where he spoke about Doing the Laundry of the Self, “…as your self enters the wash, the ego is washed out. With the shift to following what you know, the ego has no more hold.”

When John spoke about this, I could imagine when I have feelings, when a pattern is touched in me, rather than reacting in old ways, the feelings could wash through me. That, in fact, I could let the uncomfortable feelings move through, without adding story or emotion.

As feelings wash through, might it be possible to settle into a quiet place within? Could I connect with some deeper inner knowing of what to be or do next? I looked forward to a moment when I might try it out.

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Nothing Happening…And Then

By Jolaine

A group of us who attend meetings with John de Ruiter got together to see how we might write about the essence of John’s teachings. John is a spiritual teacher in Edmonton, Canada who had a profound awakening when he was 17 years old. And he has continually deepened in his awakening for the last 35 years. Attempting to capture who he is could be a worthy challenge.

We realized a good place to begin was to relate to what is deepest within. That may be our best bet to find within what we know John to be. From that place we could see what arose. Would writing arise? We didn’t know.

The phrase “Nothing Happening,” emerged from our discussions and seemed to characterize a good starting place to settle into. So a few days later, I sat at my computer, closed my eyes, became quiet within, and let the following express:

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A Meeting With John de Ruiter

By Jolaine

For many of us, the purpose of attending meetings with John deRuiter is to relate to the breadth and depth of who we truly are. John gives us the opportunity todirectly relate with someone who is a living example of the potential of human being-ness.

Attending a meeting with John is like taking a dip in deep waters. The room is very, very still, and a thick, restful energy fills the space. A person sits facing John and shares, often asking for advice.

John silently connects, making eye contact. It is easy to feel his tenderness, kindness, and sensitivity. The invitation to drop deeper and deeper is always present.

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