A Whole Whirlwind of Change with John de Ruiter

By Michael Wallace

John de Ruiter is an amazing teacher; applying his teaching has affected every aspect of my life. It affects my relationships, my way of being in the world, and my approach to the studies I’m currently doing. Because of an inner re-orientation towards life, I’m relying on my inner knowing. I’m drawing from within in relating with everyone and everything. I’m coming from a different place than the accustomed self I’ve been living from most of my life. I have moved into—and becoming stable in—a place of not-self. John speaks of, “Being planted in knowing.” Coming from inner knowing describes my experience exactly. For example, when I am listening to someone speak to me, I am not immediately reacting to what they say or thinking what to reply. I am letting what I hear enter me and move me before I respond to it. Then I am naturally responding from something new, rather than something old, from a fresh response, an un-planned, un-thought-through response.

How My Relationship Has Changed

And richer still is my partnership with Meg, being able to meet her and be with her in much greater depth than we have ever known. There is an inner knowing of our connectedness that is a constant. Dealing with difficulties or reactions, there is always this background knowledge of the real substance of what our relationship is. It has weight, substance and reality to it. It is the bond between us that in some way exists outside time. It is a living reality. It is the core of our being together.

 I’m starting to be solidly connected to what my being is and what I am as a being. I’m very much in my body but it is more than the physical body, deeper than the physical body. It is very grounded and real and yet there is a sense of inner space and expansiveness. I am coming from an awareness of a roomier sense of existence.

My Issues Around Money Have Changed

It’s good to reflect on how this is changing my attitude to life. For instance, money was always a big issue in my family. This led me to being quite mean and anxious around money, around not having enough. But as I gain more direct experience and knowledge of my own being, there is a real knowing of not needing anything from the outside world. There is an inner self sufficiency. So my attitude towards money has changed. It can come and go and I am much more settled. Even though as a world civilization we are becoming more and more concerned about money, in myself I am going in the opposite direction, becoming more and more free of concern.

John is the dead centre of this whole whirlwind of change going on within me, my partner and many others in the Edmonton community. John is central to it. He is forever moving me forward into whatever is next for me. He does that in the most masterful, delicate, precise, loving and giving way.

My Gratitude to John de Ruiter

I’m constantly grateful to him for everything that he gives. And I am in awe of his beingness and abilities. He demonstrates ability in so many different areas. He is able to dissect the minuteness and intricacy of what and how we are being in the world. He meets the precise needs of every individual who comes to him. And he can direct each person, in the most kind and gentle way, to return back on the path of his or her individual evolutionary journey.

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